RelationshipsBrowFunnel

18 Aug 2 min read

I Want Marriage, But She Wants Us to “Leave It to God”

Good evening. Please keep me anonymous and notify me when this is posted. I have been dating my girlfriend for almost six years, and honestly, I thought that by now we would be having serious conversations about marriage. I am 34, she is 29, and I have a stable job. I am at a stage in my life where I genuinely want to settle down and build a home. Last year, I told her that I wanted to formally meet her family because I didn't want us to continue dating without knowing where the relationship was headed. Instead of giving me a clear answer, she started giving me different reasons. At different times, she told me she wasn't ready for marriage, that her family wanted her to marry someone from their tribe, and that she wasn't comfortable with the Catholic Church and its way of worship, especially because I am Catholic. She also said she wanted to finish her studies and become financially stable before thinking about marriage. I tried to understand her and decided to give her some space instead of constantly putting pressure on her. Surprisingly, she started telling some of my friends that I had abandoned her and was no longer serious about the relationship. I was confused because I never told anyone that I was leaving her. I only stepped back because I was trying to respect the concerns she herself had raised whenever I brought up marriage. A few months later, we met again, and I reminded her that I still love her and that my intention has always been to marry her. I explained that I only became distant because I was tired of receiving different reasons whenever I tried to move the relationship forward. Her response still didn't give me peace. She wants us to forget about all the issues and continue as if nothing happened. She keeps saying that we should leave everything in God's hands and see how things go. But after almost six years together, I am honestly tired of being confused. I am not asking her to get married tomorrow. I simply want to know whether we are genuinely working towards marriage or whether we are just wasting each other's time. I love this woman, and that is why I have stayed for this long. But I also don't want to spend more years waiting for someone who is still unsure about me and about our future together. Please, I need sincere advice. What should I do?