FamilySuperSea

16 Aug 3 min read

My Mother Insulted My Wife Over Meat, Now She Needs Her Help

Good day, Eucarl and my wonderful people. Please, I need honest advice because I am really confused about what to do. I am a married man with a child, and things have not been financially easy for my wife and me. Last October, my stepsister got married. Even though I was also struggling financially, I gave my mother ₦20,000 to support the wedding preparations. She had already collected a loan from work, but I still wanted to contribute my own little way. The day before the wedding, my wife went to my mother’s house to help with the cooking. My mother-in-law even accompanied her, not to cook, but simply to greet my mother and show her respect. Unfortunately, something happened that day that my wife has not forgotten. While they were preparing food, my mother suddenly told my wife, “Please don't steal my meat. I don't even know how much your husband gave me.” She said it in front of my mother-in-law. My wife was deeply embarrassed. She felt insulted because she had gone there voluntarily to help, not to eat or take anything from the house. She became so emotional that she cried throughout the wedding. Later, my mother-in-law called me and told me exactly what had happened. Since then, things have not been the same between my wife and my mother. To be honest, I also feel my mother treats my wife differently because my stepsister’s husband is financially comfortable. He can afford to spend more money on my mother and assist with family matters in ways I currently cannot. Now my mother is preparing for her husband's burial, and this is where my problem has started again. I recently finished paying off some debts, so I genuinely don't have money to contribute right now. My mother has already told me that my stepsister's husband has promised to provide food for the burial. She has now asked my wife to come and help with the cooking again. The problem is that I cannot forget what happened the last time. My wife went there with a good heart to assist, and she came back emotionally broken and humiliated. I am afraid that if I send her there again, history might repeat itself. At the same time, this is my mother's husband's burial. I don't want anyone to say my wife refused to support the family or that I am allowing my wife to disrespect my mother. But I also don't want my wife to keep putting herself in situations where she could be insulted simply because she wants to maintain peace. Should I allow my wife to go and help with the cooking, or should I politely tell my mother that she shouldn't involve my wife this time? If you were in my shoes, what would you do? Please, Eucarl family, I need honest advice from both married men and women. I don't want emotions or insults. I genuinely want to know the best way to handle this without destroying my marriage or my relationship with my mother.